2013

"Writing is a struggle against silence."

The First Lady and I are on the move again. Recently, we went on a couple of house hunting tours of our new city, and this quote, painted in sea blue on a large sheet of manila drawing paper, was on the bedroom wall of one of the kids who was moving out soon.

The words, attributable to Mexican writer Carlos Fuentes, were powerful for me. It reminded me of how silent I am, even though words and thoughts are screaming as they bounce around in my mind.

They are the things I believe. I am deathly afraid of how others perceive these ideas. Will they like them or dislike them? Will they reach out to me with their opinions, which I, in turn will have to deal with? I already am very bad at handling confrontations, so that poses a challenge.

I read the blog of a man who died three years ago of colorectal cancer, and I find that I kind of want to be like him. Not that I want to get cancer and die, but his blogging started several years before he got cancer, and he wrote about a wide range of topics. I am not as naturally interested in the world around me as he was, which is a flaw I work every day to correct. I just hope to talk about the things that interest me and the things that move me, much as he did.

So right now, I am willing to embrace the challenge. I am willing to struggle against the silence.