I have a really bad tendency to get worked up over nothing. If there is no dissonance in my life, I'll think of something so that I can have some discord in my head. Something to stew and be upset about. It doesn't matter what it is-- some hateful words, an injustice, some disrespect-- I can turn it into instant angst. I seem to have a need to feel the sorrow of others and pull it onto myself. I know it's not healthy (I have problems of my own), but it's just how I am.
This is the end of a week when I've had to deal with that. I'm thinking of a situation at work where I feel there is injustice. The situation doesn't even concern me, and I realize that. It involves people who are grown adults, capable of making their own decisions. However, I can let my mind grab hold of this scenario, add a few ingredients, and whip it up into an incredible yoke to carry.
Thing is, I'm the only one who feels this way. I've worked with or spoken to each person recently, and there is no vibe from either of them to suggest that there is any beef or problem with me. I guess that's an important thing in my eyes, as well-- that I'm not bringing any discord into the world. But whatever's going on is not my problem. Might not even be theirs. But I've taken what I know (or think I know) of the situation, added a few details, thought about how I'd feel, and poof! I've got instant crisis. That I'm not part of the inner circle (which may be part of the problem-- flat out jealousy) and don't have all of the facts are irrelevant. I know what's best and I know justice isn't being served.
But it just doesn't matter what I think, and it never did.
So I'm working on getting control of what goes on in my head. It's been a challenge.
Friday, April 27, 2012
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Story Time, Hockey Season
We're coming to the end of the first round of hockey's Stanley Cup Playoffs, which is one of my favorite times of the year. I won't bore you with why I like watching, especially since I've already devoted previous blog space to it.
I also saw where the Norfolk Admirals of the AHL just lost after winning 29 straight games, and it reminded me of the first game I saw live.
I joined the US Navy in August 1989, somehow surviving basic training, and proceded to my 14-week Operations Specialist "A" School, at Dam Neck, Virginia, near Norfolk in October. This is the off season in that part of the world-- rainy and windy and chilly. A sailor could do just about anything for a low, low price. Especially teenaged sailors who suddenly have a little freedom to move about, after 2+ months of confinement during boot camp.
As for the school itself, there were four classes of about 25 assigned to each barracks were we stayed, and the most senior class typically wasn't on the watchbill, for quarterdeck and rover watches, though the custom was to stay in the neighborhood, since you were still on duty.
The story picks up right around the first week of February, with my class, #90043, as the furthest along.
One Friday, a 'duty' day for my class, I was able to buy discounted Hampton Roads (as they were then known) Admirals hockey tickets on base and went, even though I knew I was taking a chance. So I got onto the bus headed to Norfolk Scope arena for the game against the Virginia Lancers. I remember buying a program and thinking I'd recognize a name or two on the rosters, but no dice. The final was 6-3, though I can't seem to recall who won.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the game was up. Of course I/we had been found out. It turned out I went in one direction, and some of my classmates had gone in another, so the safety was in numbers, and no trouble came our way.
I think I still have the program around here somewhere.
I also saw where the Norfolk Admirals of the AHL just lost after winning 29 straight games, and it reminded me of the first game I saw live.
I joined the US Navy in August 1989, somehow surviving basic training, and proceded to my 14-week Operations Specialist "A" School, at Dam Neck, Virginia, near Norfolk in October. This is the off season in that part of the world-- rainy and windy and chilly. A sailor could do just about anything for a low, low price. Especially teenaged sailors who suddenly have a little freedom to move about, after 2+ months of confinement during boot camp.
As for the school itself, there were four classes of about 25 assigned to each barracks were we stayed, and the most senior class typically wasn't on the watchbill, for quarterdeck and rover watches, though the custom was to stay in the neighborhood, since you were still on duty.
The story picks up right around the first week of February, with my class, #90043, as the furthest along.
One Friday, a 'duty' day for my class, I was able to buy discounted Hampton Roads (as they were then known) Admirals hockey tickets on base and went, even though I knew I was taking a chance. So I got onto the bus headed to Norfolk Scope arena for the game against the Virginia Lancers. I remember buying a program and thinking I'd recognize a name or two on the rosters, but no dice. The final was 6-3, though I can't seem to recall who won.
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the game was up. Of course I/we had been found out. It turned out I went in one direction, and some of my classmates had gone in another, so the safety was in numbers, and no trouble came our way.
I think I still have the program around here somewhere.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Chigger Bites
Well, the weather has definitely turned for the better here in Alabama... It's the six weeks on either side of summer that nobody talks about-- humidity is what we're famous for. But for those six weeks, mornings are temperate and the sunshine positively glorious. Warm enough to wear shorts and flip flops, but not steaming hot.
This means it's now lawn and garden season. I'd spent some time raking leaves in the fall and winter, but it's now time to mow, trim the bushes and the greenery surrounding the house, and (try to) control the ant beds that pop up.
So far, I'm two for two. Two lawn days this spring, two hay fever/allergy attacks. The first was two weeks ago, midafternoon on a Sunday, when I raked some leaves in preparation of mowing. Two allergy pills didn't help much-- I kept on sneezing and blowing my nose. It turned into a pretty miserable evening. In addition, I picked up a ton of chigger bites which I am still scratching. Cortaid and nail polish were of no help. Benadryl, though, has seemed to slow things quite a bit. The redness remains, even if the itching and swelling have been greatly reduced.
The second attack was Thursday, which was mowing day. The actual work started about 9:00 and took about an hour, since I had to work at noon. I thought I did a better job of not rubbing my face, but the sneezing and runny nose picked up once again. I stopped for provisions at the drug store, allergy meds and tissue, but my work shift turned into eight eternal hours, since I was so congested, and so thick-headed due to two allergy pills that were no match. The Kleenex also stood no chance, as I went to the store for more later on.
I tried the drugs, food, M and M candy, and even a late-night potable. As it turned out, the only thing that worked, both times, was a good night's sleep and a chance for my body to recover.
This means it's now lawn and garden season. I'd spent some time raking leaves in the fall and winter, but it's now time to mow, trim the bushes and the greenery surrounding the house, and (try to) control the ant beds that pop up.
So far, I'm two for two. Two lawn days this spring, two hay fever/allergy attacks. The first was two weeks ago, midafternoon on a Sunday, when I raked some leaves in preparation of mowing. Two allergy pills didn't help much-- I kept on sneezing and blowing my nose. It turned into a pretty miserable evening. In addition, I picked up a ton of chigger bites which I am still scratching. Cortaid and nail polish were of no help. Benadryl, though, has seemed to slow things quite a bit. The redness remains, even if the itching and swelling have been greatly reduced.
The second attack was Thursday, which was mowing day. The actual work started about 9:00 and took about an hour, since I had to work at noon. I thought I did a better job of not rubbing my face, but the sneezing and runny nose picked up once again. I stopped for provisions at the drug store, allergy meds and tissue, but my work shift turned into eight eternal hours, since I was so congested, and so thick-headed due to two allergy pills that were no match. The Kleenex also stood no chance, as I went to the store for more later on.
I tried the drugs, food, M and M candy, and even a late-night potable. As it turned out, the only thing that worked, both times, was a good night's sleep and a chance for my body to recover.
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